Child Resiliency

On resiliency and children.







This topic is an ongoing discussion around here.  Our youngest is ADHD
like me and I was raised with only dictatorial and authoritarian
models.  I've had to change gears a couple of times.  Fortunately I had
two more resilient daughters to practise on before our youngest ADHD
came to the fore.



 



The latest bedside reading and where the conversation lies just now is Hold on to your Kids by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Mate.



Here is a review of the book.



Another commentary.




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Pierrette wrote:



Kids have to bond to an adult to develop properly. For different
reasons, many kids do not anymore - left to watch TV, parents too busy,
dysfunctional families etc., and because humans are programmed to
attach, they do so to peers. This is like the blind leading the blind,
and they do not have the mentors that allow them to mature properly.
That is why, the bond between parent and child is more important than
the chores. That does not mean letting the child get away with things
though. It means being a model of what we want our child to become.







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If I didn't want to look like the blind leading the blind, I had to
learn to change some of the models I had as my default settings for
parenting.  My definition of spiritual growth is the degree I'm willing
to diminish my ego. 



Ever leaping sideways through the vaults of the meta web of my mind.